Days 873 and 874

I just didn’t have it inme to post last night.

This one is so hard. I haven’t drunk but I have eaten four donuts in two days plus cereal plus vanilla tootsie rolls. I inherited from mother an inability to ask for help and from father the fear that not useful = not wanted. It’s been a real fun weekend.Lotta crying in addition to the carbs.

I’m hugely grateful to be sober and -able- to learn and grow from all this but I wish I didn’t -have- to learn and grow from all this. I’m asking for help but damn is it hard.

Bed now though. Huzzah.