Day 525

A very long day with many ups and downs of mood. It is ending well though, and a big part of that is because I’m sober. I’m up an hour later than usual but things are just as in-focus as they were six hours ago, I haven’t had any big sloppy emotional issues with the family, I haven’t done any of that crazy late night eating and the sleep, when it comes, will be restful. Best of all, though, is having absolutely nothing to regret in the morning. One of the quietly massive things about long term sobriety that I didn’t even consider would be as life changing as it has been is losing all that morning after regret and the self-recrimination which accompanied it. It’s like a glacier: quiet but huge and most of it is hidden.