Day 803

Another really emotionally hard day. The one-two punch of stress at both work and Home is getting to me.

Enough that this blogging thing has saved me again: in the late afternoon and early evening That Voice was so loud and so sirenlike that even “what, and give up more than two _years_?!!?” wasn’t quite a strong enough reply but “and howinhell would you tell the blogosphere about -that-, huh?” was enough. Praise be. Accountability helps - it really does. I was sitting with “aw fuck it; what’s the point of staying sober when it’s going to crap around you anyway?” for way more of this day than I liked...but I got through it. No booze.

I had pizza -and- one of those individual fruit pies which aren’t ever as good as you think they’re gonna be and started a new knitting project. The urge faded eventually.

Bedtime now. The sleep will be restful and shame free.

After all, nobody ever, anywhere, woke up and thought “gee, I wish I’d gotten good and drunk last night. I really regret not drinking.”