Praise be for Christmas cookies. I packed some for breakfast today and it was like having s little bit of stockpiled love in every bite. On a day which really needed it.
First thing this morning our 4 citations has sprouted 5 friends for a total of 9 which in the grand scheme of things is probably a fine number but which feels like a lot since we are usually in the 4-6 range.
Then I had that big drive and of course my head was full of nothing but that “everyone’s invited” thing from yesterday and I was still just undone. Si when I got back I fixed it by getting it canceled and the relief was stunning in its degree and physicality. I hadn’t realized just how overcome I had been; I don’t do rage well. I suppose none of us do.
Came home and did as close to nothing as possible. Except for eating way too many more cookies and fudge, that is. I had been doing really really well with the emotional eating but tonight I kept having one more of those tasty treats I had made over the past ten days. Plus a handful of almonds. Had to stop myself and leave the kitchen entirely when I realized I was standing in front of the open pantry nibbling a saltine straight from its sleeve.
I’ve since moved from couch to bed but am amazingly bone-achingly tired...this much angst drains a person.
Throughout it all, though, I didn’t want a drink at all so that’s full of win.
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