Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Day 586

Another bed-by-nine kind of day.

Nothing bad happened but I was irritable all day. Maybe the suddenly -very- cold weather is part of it.  In any case it was one of those days where nothing felt good or right. Intellectually I knew things were as they should be but emotionally it mostly sucked.

Took the younger two kids out to dinner - that helped a bit...though I also had a big breakfast and regular lunch so I ended up eating more and moving less today than I have in a very long time. Am having to work hard not to get all down on myself for it, too. Yet another reason to go to bed - can’t hop on the train of self-loathing if I’m asleep. One of my big ongoing projects is to think of myself as well as I think of everyone else which is turning out to be much harder than I thought.

But hey, I’m one step farther along the sober path and that’s always a win.

2 comments:

  1. It's super hard to be forgiving of ourselves for being human!
    I gained 3 pounds this vacation, and I am struggling to get balance back with food myself. I have a cold, and so yoga is our, and it's FREEZING HERE!!!
    xo

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  2. You are so right that self-forgiveness is difficult...lots of compassion for others but none for ourselves. Someone more religious than I once said that tougher rules for ourselves than everyone else is a kind of Sin of Pride - who are we to think we -should- be held to higher standards? Gave me pause. But yeah it's FREEZING here too and that just colors -everything-!

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