A better evening.
Spouse remotely guided me through something which fixed the internet which was a huge de-stressor . Created a ridiculously easy but surprisingly tasty entree for myself (package of baked tofu diced into a bowl, add small jar slivered pimento, microwave till hot, stir in a generous tablespoon toasted sesame seeds and two of hoisin sauce - done) and that was a help too. Still out of sorts and achy and already in bed for the night but a good meal and a shower made things much less miserable.
Really making an effort not to criticize myself didn't hurt either. Seems like now that I don't have the drinking to use as a club to beat myself That Voice is trying to latch onto other things like food and exercise and use of free time...where did I get this asshole who shares my headspace?!!? Definitely need to change the terms of -that- lease...which is far easier said than done.
Try the mirror exercises of looking in the mirror and telling yourself you are awesome, deserving and worthy of happiness and peace.
ReplyDeleteRepeat it for a while.
It's powerful, and it helps retrain that inner voice.
I think I will. That same inner voice has, of course, scoffed at "that mirror thing" for decades probably because it feels threatened.
Delete