Sunday, October 30, 2016

Day 163

A much harder day.

Not in the booze thoughts sense but in the everything -being- harder sense.

Woke up at a bit past one in the morning with a true shaking chill. Did all the chores but it was like slogging uphill through mud the whole way. Sewing a little zippered case for my new earbuds was harder and had more setbacks than all my recent sewing combined. ABL acted out and it rained all day so I walked on the treadmill and even an audiobook didn't  take -all- the boring away.

I thought I was just moody/hormonal/emotionally out of sorts but I fell hard asleep on the couch after dinner and was sick to my stomach after I woke up so the "oh. You're sick, silly" lightbulb finally went off. Now I'm in bed. Just being horizontal and under the covers is ever so much better; think how great it will be when I get solid restful not-drunk not-hungover sleep.

Wow...I just casually accepted as baseline-normal a -huge- level of feeling really lousy for Just Years. Never thought otherwise about it at the time but now I'm thinking gosh that was unnecessarily hard.

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