Friday, June 10, 2016


Three weeks. Two-thirds of the way to 30. Ten percent of the longest sober time I've ever had (202 days.)

It was a lovely morning: used some unexpected free time on a lovely cool breezy day and walked to the  public library for the first time in at least five years. Renewed my card, checked out a couple books - was very restorative. Libraries saved my childhood so I have a particular fondness but the whole Kindle phenomenon coupled with never seeming to get the books back on time made me drift away from that fine institution. Going back was wonderful. Probably like returning to one's beloved home church or temple for a religious person. Good stuff.

Got two extra bonuses: walking back via a pretty alley I'd never been on in 16 years of living here and meeting up with a colleague on the street.

Then evening came and with it the phone call from Spouse which included "you should stop that [sobriety] while I'm up there; it will be way more fun."

Oh Lordy.

I'm hoping it was just the booze talking and that things will be more thoughtful once Spouse and Eldest are up here. Hoping a lot, actually, because "we are only going to be here five days" will just be the tip of the persuasion iceberg otherwise...and I'm not sure I'm strong enough to stand - even with the support of the blogosphere - against that kind of targeted opposition.

Maybe I'm worrying for no reason. When I did the six months not so long ago there was no active sabotage or derision. Perhaps things will seem different in the morning.

1 comment:

  1. I hope you can see beyond the sabotage to understand that "that" issue isn't with you. I hope you can find the inner strength to do whatever is right for you. Maybe before the expectation was that you would fail and this time there is more emotion wrapped up in this from others...maybe a fear you will actually succeed?