Day 100

Triple digits! Huzzah!

The day started out fine: lovely grilled cheese for breakfast.

Went downhill though: ears driving me nuts (remember the psoriasis?) dogs pesky, weather hot and the put-upon/resentment started building up. Even ice cream for dinner didn't help much. Got stuck in that vicious loop of "family doesn't appreciate me" and it wouldn't let up for what seemed like forever though I suppose was really only about three hours

I grumbled a little but mostly excused myself from the rest of the (ungrateful! Unappreciative! Uncaring! Unsympathetic!) family and played stupid phone games till it eased up. Was painfully obvious that a lot of it was in my head when Spouse asked "what can I do?" with genuine concern and empathy only to have me say "I don't know!"

Eventually it eased up. Like booze cravings it always does even if you think it won't. A snack helped too even though I already had dinner and didn't think I was the least bit hungry. Now I'm in my nice quiet bed and can hear the rest of the family going about whatever it is they think they need to do but I've said goodnight so am no longer expected to be a part of anything or -know- anything like where stuff is or the status of anything. That of itself is a nice feeling.

Not to worry; I haven't forgotten that I still owe myself a lunch. Maybe now that the weather has cooled off and I don't think everydamnedthing is too much effort I'll actually do it this week. And yes, I'm proud of how far I have come and a big part of it is all you fine people. Work doesn't know and family doesn't pay attention especially as I don't bring it up because several are trying to find their own paths that way so my blog and the blogfriends it brings have become an important tool for me. Blogging on my phone from bed as a way to unwind and recharge has become an important ritual for me so thank you all for being there.