Another rough day.
Spent the whole day weepy, exhausted or weepy -and- exhausted. Since 9:30 this morning I have wanted to crawl back into bed and now at just past 11 I finally have.
Had ice cream twice tonight which didn't hurt although it didn't help as much as I hoped it would. Spouse commenting once again "I am so envious" about my sobriety helped as much if not more. Felt nice to say "thanks...tomorrow will be ninety days."
Wish I had a treat planned: my original "take self to lunch" idea isn't going to fly because I have to be physically on-site at work all day. On the other hand doing it day after tomorrow would be fine too. Plus I need to get some tangible item too so that I can be reminded "yeah, that was my Day 90 present." My swell tie-dyed T-shirt has become my Day Seventy Shirt which I like very much.
Oh and the other thing: only in the past week to ten days - Day 80-ish - have I finally started to move past the Must. Eat. Lots. stage. I've still got a big sweet tooth but I'm not needing such big portions and I haven't done that All The Carbs thing in long enough I can't remember exactly when it last was. I knew from last time that eventually that bottomless pit thing eased up but I couldn't remember how long it took. "Far longer than you want or think it ought" seems to be the answer.
And now to sleep.
Hope you wake up refreshed. Moods are hard!!
ReplyDeleteOh to have the bottomless pit thing end! All these moods, somehow they are needed, somehow weepy and exhausted is working on building inner 'something'. Maybe this is all the built up small stuff that is spill in over like a pan on a low heat just spill in a little trickle out the side. Eventually it has spilt over enough that the lid just sits on nicely and only lifts up occasionally.
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